Lord I’ve done it again. I’ve taken my focus off from you and I am looking at my circumstance from a front row seat. You told me to cast all my cares on you but sometimes I feel the need to pick them back up. I find myself saying, “If I just do this, fix that or change something else, everything will fall in place”. I question the place or the position you have set me in during this season. But I am recognizing that whatever place you set me in, your grace is sufficient.
The other night, I dreamed from the moment I close my eyes until I opened them. I almost did not want to wake up. My dream was real; I was doing exactly what God had placed on my heart to do. It is not very often that I dream like this or am even able to recall but something about this dream was different. I saw myself in the future. I saw myself the way God sees me, doing the work that he has called me to do. I wasn’t worried and there was no stress, everything was falling into place. I know this is God’s way of speaking to me. Sometimes there is so much going on in my day to day life that I can’t stop to see the many blessings that are before me.
I have added a few words here and there to this particular post for the past few weeks. The title came to me a while ago, but the words just didn’t seem to come out right. You see some of the things that I have been working on have been falling into place but I have been falling apart. I have become my worst critic, speaking my own defeat and not maintaining my focus. Where at one point being transparent was not an issue, I have found myself once again hiding behind accomplishments and titles. I read a blog post on this evening titled Break Me Down and it did just that.
I had moved from that place of transparency, that place of healing where I felt so free to pour out my heart and God always filled it with so much love and joy. When I picked back up my cares, I told God that I trusted my judgement more than his, which left no room for transparency. I am at My Place of Grace…I am thanking God for showing me my heart. It is through transparency the place from which I write and speak that penetrates the hearts of those that are hurting. It is that place that brings light to a dark situation. It is that place from which I can tell someone to keep pushing on because God is giving me the strength to do the same. It is that place from which testimonies and triumphs are born.
I am at My Place of Grace…
“Though he were a Son, yet learned he obedience by the things which he suffered;” Hebrews 5:8